It is really hard to be the fattest person in an exercise class. I know I'm not supposed to say fat, or compare my body to others, but Jesus. and I'm not even large enough to be considered "inspirational", as in look at her go...she's really going to do it this time. I'm just...large.
This is only the case in the class I am taking at the big chain gym. The one where there are mirrors and I can see myself. The one I take through community education...I don't feel self conscious at all. Weird.
But. Even though i feel like one of the middle aged ladies in the Sweatin' to the Oldies videos my mom did as a kid, I am still going.
When I would go to my belly dancing classes, I was the biggest girl in the room. And staring at your own body move for an hour in a mirror? Oh, here cometh the self-loathing, akin to that of *clothes shopping*.
ReplyDeleteKnow what? They are all thinking the same thing about themselves. They aren't watching what you're doing because they are too worried about their own bodies in the mirror. Promise.